Lost Start

It’s 2001, and my plane’s descending into Beijing International Airport. I look out the window and I see black cars, dead trees and pollution so thick that I can actually look and stare at the sun. And I think to myself, what on earth have I gotten myself into? I was embarking on a one-year study abroad program to learn Chinese. My ex-girlfriend said don’t go, my parents told me not to go and I was starting to think maybe they were right. 

Now, the whole journey didn’t start off very well. About 12 hours earlier, I was at Sydney Kingsford Smith International Airport, and I was walking down the aisle of their 747. I remember thinking the one thing that most young 21-year-old guys would think that I was hoping that the person sitting next to me would be hot, [audience laughter] young and single. [audience laughter] As I got there and I arrived at my chair, I looked down and she wasn’t hot, she wasn’t young and she wasn’t single. There was a middle-aged lady there, bit of gray hair and she was old enough to be my mother. And so, I let out a big sigh and I consoled myself by saying maybe she has a daughter. [audience laughter] 

Anyway, I sit down. We make eye contact. We don’t really chat with each other. But then, after the plane takes off, I realized that this middle-aged lady, this middle-aged Chinese lady, she didn’t speak any English. This was a big problem for me, because one, I didn’t speak that much Chinese. That’s why I was going there to study. And two, I felt like it was people like her who made people like me look bad. I mean, I’m an Australian-born Chinese. I was born in Australia, I eat Vegemite, I play cricket, I’ve even watched Neighbours. [audience chuckle] Yeah, no, it’s a bad definition. Okay, sorry. [audience chuckle] 

But then she, on the other hand, didn’t speak any English, she probably spoke really loud and she probably was one of those people who didn’t line up in queues. [audience laughter] I felt a little bit torn, like, ​“Do I help her or do I just not help her?” I was torn for the whole flight, for 12 hours. The flight attendant would come by and she’d look at the middle-aged lady and ask, ​“Chicken or beef?” And the middle-aged lady would look at me and the flight attendant would look at me and then the flight attendant would say, ​“Does your mom want chicken or beef?” [audience laughter] And so, I try to explain to her, she’s not my mom, maybe a future mother-in-law, I don’t know. [audience laughter] I sat there. And for the next 12 hours, it was just a painful journey because I’m like a live translator for her. 

Anyway, we’re about to land in Beijing International Airport. We touch down, I wave goodbye to the middle-aged Chinese lady and I go through customs, I pick up my bags and I exit the terminal. I didn’t really plan very well. At 21, you don’t really plan very well. I realized that I couldn’t read any of the characters or any of the signage. I was hoping that there would be a bus that would take me directly to my university. Obviously, there wasn’t. I walked up to a guy who looked like a security guard and I asked him for directions and he waved his hands in multiple directions and gave me a grunt. So, I realized that he didn’t know what I was saying and I couldn’t understand what he was saying.

I went to another guy and I asked him which way to go. He pointed me in multiple directions. I started to realize that I was in China and I couldn’t speak Chinese, I felt really lost and I didn’t know what I was going to do, because I had to somehow find my way to my university. I get a tap on my back. I turn around and it’s a middle-aged Chinese lady. And she asks me where I’m going. And so, I get my piece of paper and point to the address. Next thing I know, she pulls me towards the taxi ranks, she throws me into a taxi and she jumps into the taxi as well. We spend the next one and a half hours getting to my location, to my university.

By the time I get to campus, I get into my dorm to make sure I’m in the right place. I turn around, I wave goodbye to the Chinese lady and she waves back as well. I never actually found out what her name was and I never actually found out if she even lived in the direction of where I was going, and I never even found out if she had a daughter. [audience laughter] But the one thing that I did find out, was that every day in every country, there’s somebody starting a brand-new journey in a brand-new country, and they may not be able to speak English, they may not be able to understand that culture and they’re probably just as scared and lost as I was. And so, if I ever meet somebody like that, I need to judge less and help more. Thank you.